Date set and triple x tomorrow.

Finally the exact date has been set, no more speculation or use of none specific time-frames. I shall be making the trip to my new home in Scotland this coming Friday! The 5 hour car ride is almost certainly going to be a boring one, even when accompanied by my dad and his partner Jane I can’t help but feel 5 hours in a car will lend itself perfectly to boredom. Thankfully, I shall be providing some of the music we will be listening to and Valley of the Damned could keep me sane during the longest of journeys!
Tomorrow is the Triple X show, which as always I am looking forward to. I’m not sure there is any wrestling promotion in the world, let alone the UK that offers the things Triple X does to either its fans or its workers. With the last crowd being so good, I’m optimistic that tomorrow will also be a great turn out and a great night will be had for all of those in attendance. Looking forward to catching up with the usual guys and of course wrestling eXodus.
This is just a short and sweet blog, I’ll probably be writing another before the big move. I’ll just say, right now I’m both excited and relieved, it’s been a long time coming and I can’t wait!

The salvation in the big bag.

So, for the most part another boring weekend, the days surrounding no better either. I doubt today will break that trend and my boredom seems set to continue for some time yet. My mood is pretty upbeat at the moment though, which can be attributed to a renewed sense of stability in my relationship which had recently been turbulent at best and at times hellish. I think after reaching somewhat of a peak a few days ago things are getting back on track.
I can't say that all of the problems were due to the continued distance between us but i do think that it is a huge contributing factor and thankfully one which is soon to be removed. This reminds me that i must apologise to my dad for seemingly without reason becoming very moody and rushing him to take me home, whilst he was happily fishing.
Relationships are hard, really hard and something you don't even think about can easily become a fairly large issue. Things done in the best intention can come back to haunt you. Still, i feel i'm learning more about being in a relationship with each passing day. Perhaps one day i'll actually be good at it.
I also hope that in time i will be less quick to jump to making angry rants about my other half when things do get bad. I posted a blog recently which made some very unfair comments, whilst it was not up for long, it probably should never have been published.
Anyway, as i say, things are back on track, a very tense and testing summit traversed. The past few days have actually been great relationshipwise, me and simmons have both admitted where we did wrong, have both talked things through and both realised that the direction we were headed was not the way we wanted to go. We now seem to be spending more time talking than we have in the past month or so and enjoying it. Hopefully, he will be making the long trip down to coventry on the 16th of july to spend 5 days here. If he is able, that time will be great, i'm sure. I still miss him no matter how much we talk and nothing can quite compare to when he is actually here, or i there.

Saturday was perhaps the one exception of my boring past few days. I headed out with my dad, jane, nathan (little bro) and his friend to the summer fate thing at Brammcote Barracks. All in all it was a pretty fun day, apparently Gurkah food is quite nice, the potato curry being the highlight.
There was a stall at the open day which was selling samosa's, onion baaji's and a variety of other food. The baaji's were great, the samosa's were ok but could have done with being a few notches spicier. However, the low point of this stall was some of the more 'healthy' food they were supplying. They had 'stuff vineleaves' which appealed to jane's vegan taste in food and i decided i would try one. Upon biting into this incredibly greasy, disgusting smelling green turd resembling 'food' I was greeted with perhaps the most grotesque taste i have ever had the misfortune of putting into my mouth. The oil from this thing just dripped on my tongue and filled my mouth on first bite. The vineleaf was stuffed with rice with a lemon hint and ofcourse the aforementioned oil. I'm not quite sure which bit of this hideous food offended me most but even before i began chewing i knew swallowing it would lead me to projectile vomit worse than the absinth mentioned in a previous blog. So here i was, in the middle of a field, this disgusting food resting on my tongue, looking around for a bin to dispose of it. I stood for i guess around 5 minutes, just surveying the various stalls in hope that i would not be forced to eventually swallow this rancid hippy food. Well i found one, i can't say i'd ever been so happy to have my head dangling over a black bag filled with various food scraps and rubbish on a hot day. The smell of the bin i remember well, it filled my nostrils infusing me with a sense of hope, this was the smell of salvation, a smell i will actually fondly remember for sometime to come. Even my father who i am certain could eat roasted dog shit without batting an eyelid tried one not long after me, having not seen the effect it had on me, also having to spit it out. Well, jane seemed to enjoy these for some reason, she ate 10 of the things. I guess when you're accustomed to drinking soya milk, this is no huge feat. All day i struggled with the after taste, even having not swallowed any, nor chewing it, the vile oil must have made it's way down my throat and soaked my tongue.
Anyway, the rest of the day was good, we left the barracks and dropped nathan and his friend off, then went to my janes boat, did some fishing, sat around etc, it was pretty sweet. Then came a text and subsequent phone calls between me and simmons at which point i turned somewhat... distracted and moody.

that's pretty much all i have been upto, it's not a lot and when the most interesting thing you have to blog about is the worst food you've ever tried, i guess it's bound to fail! A few wrestling shows coming up in the next couple of weeks though it seems and simmons just messaged me a few moments ago confirming he has brought his train tickets for the 16th! I can't wait :)

Ciao for now!

A more conventional blog, i guess?

this heat is really starting to send me slightly insane, it's ruining my sleeping pattern beyond repair. I'm not sure i can even remember the last time i slept for more than 4 or 5 hours at any one time. My fan is of little help in this recent heat wave, even sat next to me, the breeze i am getting from it is only slightly cooler than the surrounding air. I feel like a small african child sowing soccer balls in a sweat shop. I am sat here shirtless, having to lean foward slightly as my leather chair is covered in a cold sweat, which is quite disgusting.

Recently my blogs have deviated from the usual format, in that they have been less about what is going on, than topical. My most recent two for instance really broke the old format and came in the form of lightly humorous rants. When your Polish friend asks you to rant on polish immigrants, the oppertunity must be taken up, regardless of actual views, a ridiculous post must be made. I hope that people are able to see the humor as opposed to insults. Today though i come with a more usual blog.

So, as of yesterday, the flat in dundee is officially now rented, Simmons went and picked up the keys, my keys should be getting cut in the next few days, which is ace. It really is hard to really get my head around just how close and real this is now.

In perhaps a few months, for a lot of you who i see on a semi-regular basis the only way of keeping up with what's going on with me will be from scarce appearances in the midlands wrestling scene and through these here blogs. I'll be living in an absurd country... It is odd, i would have expected with such a large move that i would be nervous, which just isn't the case, infact i feel a small sense of excitement.

My excitement on moving up to Dundee is perhaps hightened by the fact that within a few months of being there, Dragonforce shall be playing just around the corner, which is a huge plus!

Well, i finally have some pictures of the flat, which is what i was making this blog to share!



Buster sat on alert, guarding the flat, whilst teddy goes about keeping the bed warm! Too cute xD



I told you Scotland is odd, we haven't even moved in yet and theres a paedo in a car outside the bedroom waiting for a glimpse!



A shot of the front room, the couches may look like they have been stained with years worth of periods but they're comfy and that's what counts... right?



Another shot of the front room. One of the first boxes my partner moves in is seemingly a box of personal hygene products, most likely the box has more skin conditioners than were previously even known to man.



Because you know that a blurry photo of what i guess is a cheese grater makes sense...



The kitchen really is as small as i remember, it's also fairly nice looking.

So there it is, the place i shall soon enough be calling home.

Other than that i've nothing really to blog about, im bored and tired

Polish descrimination.

Have you ever lost your job to find out perhaps only days later from an old colleague that the person replacing you is a Mr Kowalski, a man of polish descent who can barely speak English but is willing to work for minimum wage or in some cases below it? I'm sure if you have been in this situation that you found yourself not only frustrated but angry. 'How could we allow immigration to harm the british worker in this way!?'. Whilst i can understand the frustration that this is met with, i must implore you to think again who really is at fault.

It is true that in recent years Polands main export is misery and miserable emigrants but there are many underlying problems which go much deeper than a few summer holiday camps built by the late great adolf hitler and all polackticians being retarded idiots. This country is a prime example that the 3rd world stretches well into Europe and that communism is still a force hurting millions across the globe. What though is the issue that i believe is most important to understand if we are to truely sympathise with the situation?

I believe perhaps it is exactly the same company behind the sucess of all great nations that is not only holding Poland back but discriminating against them with the sole purpose of further ruining the country. We only need look within our great isle to see the power wielded in one simple product. Scotland, like Poland is a loathsome place. Both have at one point or another been seen in such an unfortunate state that neighbouring countries felt the need to intervene in an attempt to bring them up to par with the civilised world. What is it that causes Scotlands ridiculous state? The people in Scotland drink what is known as 'Irn Bru' or fluorescent piss as we in England know it. This in itself is not a problem, the lack of drinking Coca-Cola is. Whilst the Scots choose not to advance into the current century, the same cannot be said for the Polish, who are willing to change and wanting to advance.

Have you ever had the misfortune of drinking polish cola? I have, and i can understand why the Polish are fleeing their country at such an alarming rate. It would be a terrible thing to be out in the hot sun, painting fences and having to sip at this vile excuse for cola.

The coca-cola company is choosing to offer the Polish people an inferior cola in order to ruin the country, for their continued support of communism. All that is happening however is the Polish people are fleeing for lakes with greener seaweed and in turn ruining innocent countries. The worst part is, whilst we watch the huge influx of polacks who land on our shores, we are powerless to do anything to stop the issue.

The English government has not yet lost faith in poland as they have Scotland. Unlike with Scotland us English are not just giving false power to a failing nation in hopes that they will deal with their own problems, but granting assylum because of this horrible situation. Much like we grant assylum for those in countries of war, famine and rape, we, knowing the power that Coca-Cola holds over us, invite the polish in with arms wide open. This in turn is having a profound effect on our economy. When we consider that Britain is not the only place harbouring these people and feeling the effects of cheap labour on the native work force infact the issue is global. The Polish which still put their faith in communism are moving to cuba, The mentally ill to france and the morbidly obese to america.

This is the reason for the recent global economic depression and it all takes it's roots within the vast Coca-Cola corporation. How can we fight the corporations which is ruining our planet? I am unsure, when coca-cola can be in some ways defined by the following: there may well not be a way.

* Coca-Cola is devoid of humanity, morality, pity, and mercy.

* Coca-Cola works as one, because none of us are as cruel as all of us.

* Coca-Cola cannot be harmed, no matter how many Coca-Cola may fall in battle.

* Coca-Cola doesn't fall in battle, anyway.

* Coca-Cola only undertakes Serious Business.

* Coca-Cola is everyone

* Coca-Cola is everywhere.

* Coca-Cola cannot be out-numbered.

* Coca-Cola is a hydra, constantly moving, constantly changing. Remove one head, and nine replace it.

I will shortly make an online petition raising my concerns and once i have found enough support, i will present the petition to as many people as needed to make sure this vicious descrimination of the polish is put to a stop. This is all on the issue for now, check back for progress updates!

Fucking old people!

Well, yet again i am sat here having not slept at the normal times... i'm tired, i'm bored, i'm irritable and i'm looking through some of my old seesmic videos. There are a few which might be interesting for future use, but i have pin pointed one in which i would like to be my first rant in video form to appear on this blog.

The video itself is almost a year old. The sound quality, the video quality, both are not the best, it was taken with a fairly crappy webcam.

The topic is old people and how much they can piss me off at times.

Essentially, the video is about an incident which highlights the way old people often times will take advantage of respect younger people tend to show to them. If i remember correctly, the old woman i am talking about, seemed in good health and was carrying nothing. Where as on the other hand i was. The video explains it better. Again if you're reading this on facebook, you need to goto the original source of my blog: http://srgtf.blogspot.com to view the video.



So many old people will talk about how the young do not treat them right, how they feel threatened by the young, how the current day young people are degenerates, my response to that is that in this day and age, old people take advantage, they get in the way and sometimes smell of pee.

A similar confrontation between myself and an old woman happened much more recently, it was i believe the last time i was in dundee, a month or two ago and some old woman was stood, right in the middle of an aisle in tesco, blocking everyone getting past, chatting with another old woman who also was inconveniently placed. I loudly said 'If somebody doesn't move, i'm going to rum them down like a dog'. Again the old woman looked at me as if i had just pissed all over her favourite grand child or perhaps ripped off her clothing and smeared fecal matter all over her long sagged breasts.

As i mentioned in the video almost a year ago, i am not an unfair person, i am willing and completely happy to accomodate the needs of old people and put myself out to make sure that what could quite possibly be their last living day is a pleasent one but i often feel they take advantage of their age and feel they can purposely inconvenience everybody at their own leisure and it does not sit well with me!

There are plenty of less annoying old people out there, but like with queers, it's the fucking annoying ones which stick out most in peoples minds and i'm sure anyone reading this has some experience of an old person, just taking the piss or being incredibly selfish. Perhaps their continued existance in itself is selfish, if they died quicker the inheritance they leave to their children would be worth more... it's all well and great getting inheritance once you're 50 odd and have your own house and car, but wouldn't it make more of a difference earlier?

In all honesty, i believe some of my comments here come across very offensive, some of them are tongue in cheek and just to make interested an otherwise boring blog, but some of them stand.

The old people of today look upon the young as degenerates, perhaps the old people of yesteryear would look upon todays old people as an embarrasment, i am unsre.

Anyway, i'm going to play a little bejeweled and head to bed.

Just thought i would post an old video and add to it in text. I think this is the way i will be doing a lot of my blogs in the future, a little video and some accompanying text.

The final thoughts, 2 topics!

So i went to bed and fell asleep somewhere between 2 and 4 hours ago, i'm not one hundered percent sure and now i find myself wide awake and unable to fall back to sleep, certainly not for the lack of wanting to. On waking up i went to get myself a pint of ice cold milk as i find that it sometimes helps. Obviously though the milk did not have the desired effect on me and after 10 minutes with no sign of sleep nearing i decided to get up.
I took the oppertunity to make myself a little more familiar with the work of the recently deceased Michael Jackson. I downloaded his album of numbers ones and upon listening to them find myself a little puzzled. The songs are certainly catchy, i even like some of them. He had a fantastic voice and his passion really does come across in the music. I do however find the music for the most part isn't quite to my taste. Random noises and emphasis on irrelevent words in his songs seem to make them hard to listen to, at least for me and i find that it is slightly annoying in some songs. Either way, i can appriciate his music and understand why it is that he was so sucessful despite his somewhat bizzare and perhaps slightly tragic life. I will give it another listen a time when i am awake through choice, perhaps then i will find the chaotic nature of his songs a little less offensive on the ears and enjoy it a little more.

well now i have some R.E.M on, which i believe is more suited to my current state of mind and more relaxing, which is perhaps just what the doctor ordered in my quest for sleep. At least it is hopefully a start, i will probably soon move onto a bit of queen, perhaps some of the softer creed songs too.

You know, i still get a lot of questions pertaining to my sexuality, usually in a day i can expect two or more people to in someway question something to do with it. Sometimes these people are people i haven't spoken to for a long while who have seen my facebook, heard something from someone else or some how came to the knowledge that i'm a fag, sometimes these people are people who've known a while and perhaps a certain question comes up in general conversation. I have yet to be up 30 minutes and have already answered a few of the more 'usual' questions. In all seriousness i do not mind the questions, infact the impression i usually get from people asking is that of genuine intrigue or the desire to understand better something which is a little hard to understand if you're not that way... at least to some people. The questions are in a way quite nice, the fact that people take the time to show interest and to better understand is almost heart warming. The questions usually take a fairly uniform route, i could easily write in notepad a few prewritten responses and answer them all without the person ever knowing. 'How long have you known?' 'How did you know?', these are probably 2 of the most common questions and the answers to them are plainly simple and answering them as questions with the words 'you were straight?' on the end would be enough, if i were a bitchy person.
The point is, like any sexuality, i believe homosexuality becomes aparent at around the same time that any straight person would realise they like the opposite sex. How does one know they are gay? Instead of that attraction to the opposite sex it is to the same sex, which of course would pretty much be the definition of homosexuality anyway.

I don't think i've ever really blogged about my general views on homosexuality, it's portrayal or the specific struggles and grievances i had, when discovering it was the affliction with which i was burdened. I think i will do so, trying to touch on a few of the key feelings i have toward it, how those feelings have changed and what i think it means to me. Now, this means a slightly deep blog at points most likely, but hopefully i can keep it interesting with similes between homosexuality and bad things.

For years, as i've probably mentioned in my blogs previously at some point or another and if not i've certainly mentioned to some friends in conversation, i disliked, perhaps even hated gay people, at least in some form. Realising that i myself was gay, i felt that the general demeanor of gay people was not only the basis for a stereotype which i found myself hating but one i thought i would be one day stigmatised with. It always seemed to me like so many gays would purposely conform to this stereotype for some reason which i could never quite work out. My own predjudices led me to believe it would be impossible for others to view me outside of the stereotype. All the people i had known who had been gay conformed in some often times large way to it and the thought that I as a person would be banded in with that was to me an offensive thought. I was not like a lot of the gay people i had seen, either those in real life or those on television, i was just some 'normalish' guy who happened to be gay but how could that be? Was i not meant to like prancing around as opposed to walking? Ballet as opposed to wrestling? pop as opposed to metal and rock? Was i also not meant to be incredibly flambouyant in everything i did or extremely emotional as opposed to rational? When all i had to judge myself by was a select few who conformed to the stereotype i became a little confused, self hating infact. I hated what i saw, i hated that i would be labled as anything to do with that.
The point is, whilst i viewed the 'gay community' with such abhorring, i myself was becoming my own worst enemy. I alone had become more predjudiced than most others. Thankfully, it is hard to hate something which is key to ones self, eventually something has to give and as i grew up, seeing here and there people whom i would describe as normal who were actually gay i found myself able to over time change my view on it. I began to see that stereotypes, whilst often based on the general behaviour in any group or minority, never speaks for the whole. This allowed me to really view myself as acceptable.
Homosexuality though was still something which puzzled me, logically speaking the whole idea of it is completely unsound. The idea behind relationships is that of procreation, of which there is none in homosexual coupling (i'm talking natural procreation here folks!). There seemingly from a logical stand point is absoloutely no reason for any person to conform to homosexualty. I still do not understand fully how nature selects or why. There are of course many theories out there as to why homosexuality occurs and I find all of them to be things that if proven could prove detrimental to myself and other homosexuals. The most plausable, at least in my mind is that of genetics. The idea that it is decided before birth. There is some evidence to suggest it and study shows that there are differences biologically between breeders and sodomisers. Most importantly, it is said that homosexuals have slightly longer and thicker penis's in general to those of their straight counterparts... hehe, i'm kidding... i mean, that is based factually, but it isn't the most important point... oh dear, what have i gotten myself into, thankfully, i blocked my nan and sister from reading these blogs and i must check that i also disallow access to my little brother as soon as i post this. Point is, i'm not going to go through the biological differences, if you care enough, you can easily go and wikipedia them yourselves but they do seem to exist. Other theories against this 'nature' include the way we are brought up, our relationships with parents, siblings and the like. Some idiots even believe it is possible to change your sexuality throughout life, but i'm not going to give any credit to those buffoons for their ridiculous theory. Now, if it were ever proven to be biological, i can only see bad effects coming from it. It would be seen as a flaw in genetics by haters, we would be the next mentally ill people through birth defect to them and i don't think that any good would come from it. Sympathy, perhaps... but seriously, any self respecting gay person does not want sympathy... some of us actually figure out how to be happy about it.

Homosexuality, is it un-natural? Well, i'm pretty undecided, i must say. It's obvious to me that the natural order of things calls for a male and female, hell our whole existance weighs on that partnership between man and woman and us fags really don't contribute to the survival of our species in that way. The argument could be made that it is un-natural because of that. The point that homosexuality is observed at around the same rate (somewhere between 8 and 10%) in animals is the counter argument. Perhaps it is a way of controling population but again, that isn't exactly a sound idea due to the lack of change in those percentages over time.
I guess personally that i feel it has no real purpose, no real reason, it just is. I went through a period of not really wanting to accept anything but an answer as to why i am who i am, but upon thinking about it if i applied the same desire to most of my personality traits, quirks and preferences i would get very few answers. We're all different in our own ways i guess. It's no more natural or un-natural than any preference.

Marraige? Well this one is tough. You know, a lot of gay rights faggots protest really hard for this and why? I don't understand it. Civil partnerships come with all of the benefits or marraige, under a different name, so what's the problem? The religious people want to keep marraige the sacred union between man and woman, they don't want our sodomising selves apart of that... just let them have what they want... who gives a damn if the name is different? Although, i am completely in support of civil partnerships, i believe they're filling a gap which needed filling. If a guy wants to have the legal benefits of marraige another guy, or a woman another woman, i don't see the issue. Anyone opposing these are bigoted.

I'm not going to go into religious views on homosexuality, i touched on some catholic ones in a previous blog. The fact of the matter is, all religions based on the bible take their own interpretations from it. The book of Leviticus is widely open to such interpretations and is very hazy in parts. With the assumption that the passage often quoted in the argument against homosexuality was based simply on homosexuality as a whole, it does indeed seem to speak out against it but what we have there is most probably taken out of context, the word abomination not translating all that well and generally the ridiculousness that eating shell fish is also viewed in the same light... leviticus is the basis of christian based faiths dislike for homosexuality and on such a vague mention i find basing an actual opinion on it to be ignorant.

I went through countless years of trying to sort out the homosexuality issue in my mind, it's not an easy one to really understand or make logical and it probably had a detrimental effect on me at times. I made a much bigger deal of it than i needed to. When i told my mother for instance, there was absoloutely no issue there and there she said i should have told her sooner, the point was that i couldn't, i couldn't have asked her to accept me whilst i couldn't accept it myself. Thankfully though, in recent years i have found myself with some really great friends, who are open to diversity, unbigoted and generally good people. it is though only the past year and 2 - 3 months that i have truely gotten to the point that i could accept it fully and i must say i owe that to my wonderfull other half who at this moment in time is sleeping... he fell asleep with his camera still on from when we were lying in bed talking earlier and so i get to glance at him every so often and take a screenshot to show him when he wakes up of the ridiculously cute facial expressions he makes when sleeping.

Coming to terms with this, was harder than it should have been, but with some good friends, an accepting family, my guy and of course the friends i initially told who were more help than i could ever give them credit for, whether it was listening to me rant, making the odd gay joke that other people didn't take notice of, or just being supportive, their acceptance was the first step.

Also, a special thanks to the one guy who made this all happen, the guy who commandeered one of my accounts on a forum and posted a picture of myself and simmons. Seriously, you're a cunt but you did me a great service :)

Well that is pretty much the end to my thoughts on homosexuality and hopefully, if anyone has any questions in the future, i can just point them to this blog and be done with it. Also, it means i shouldn't need to mention it again in the blog in such general terms, which is good. I'm tired of writing about it!

Right, i'm going to end this blog here. This will soon sink into the bottomless hole that is my blog where it belongs and i shall listen to a few more songs before once again attempting to sleep.

Two blogs in as many days... i am becoming a regular blogger now, which was never truely the aim of this thing. Today though i am writing with purpose. There are many great shows on TV, of course we have the usual well received shows such as 24, lost, prison break and other TV shows which get the recognition they deserve, or in some cases do not deserve, at least in my opinion... lost? Prison break? fuck that.

However, by chance and lack of any other tv to watch, i noticed a show simply called 'Kings' on ninjavideo.net. The banner for it was fairly boring, the concept didn't sound all that interesting either. However, i gave it the 42 minutes of my time that it was asking for and found myself completely in love with this new show. It really has been a long time since a show has captured me so fully, the story telling, the way the scenes are shot and unfold, the charecters... everything about this show is perhaps as perfect as one could hope.

Upon continuing to watch it, i find that it always has something else to drive your interest in it ever higher, the plot thickens show by show, story archs are played out perfectly and new mini plots are being added between charecters all the time. It feels like no scene is ever wasted, they always have a purpose in continuing the story.

The show is based around a king, as the title suggests. It is set in modern times, with plenty of modern day themes. In essence it is about a man, once a farm boy who bravely saves the prince on the battlefield and finds himself in with the royal family. There are plenty of other archs which i am not going to go through, but the portrayal of a modern day country ruled by it's king, through war and crisis is encapsulating. The writers truely make you care about the charecters, it has a great selection of lead and supporting charecters, all of which you actually care what happens to. We have the farm boy lead who ends up falling in love with the princess, a gay prince who's been told he needs to forget about that side of himself if he ever wants to be king. A king who makes some dubious decisions and has a second life off in the country. A clergy man who is very much influencial and often conflicts with the king. A queen who is at times pretty ruthless... the list goes on. The acting in this show really is top notch for the most part.

Unforuntatly though, this NBC series is not getting the exposure it deserves. I am unsure why, the tv series really does speak for itself, perhaps it is the saturday time slot the show has been given, perhaps it is just under advertised, either way this show is not getting the merit it deserves.

I'm basically just writing this to make you all aware of what is perhaps the best TV series to start in the past few years, i think it has something everybody can enjoy. So get on the torrent sites, get on ninja video and get watching this show. Unfortunatly it may only be here for the one series, either way, it's a series worth watching folks.

I'm going to post a trailer of the show beneath this blog, you'll probably only be able to see it if you click view original article, so i'll post a link too, it doesn't show off the show as it should, perhaps that is the reason it is not being so well received but check it anyway!



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u5c1Vr1fcZI

Another boring blog...

Once again i find myself aimlessly sat at my computer, the ever growing cloud of boredom encroaching upon my inactive mind. Whilst i complain about this boredom, it perhaps is the time i most find myself pondering upon different subjects, some of meaning some completely irrelevent to anything. Right now i have no specific thoughts pertaining to any subject of interest though which is slowly leading me into a higher form of boredom, the type that last saw me rant on organised religion. Fear not for i believe no such rant is on the horizon and instead perhaps i can fill your simple minds with even simpler feelings of joy and happiness through a blog filled with lovely stories of fairy tale endings?

The fact that i am incapable of writing such a blog of happy stories is probably the thought which is currently occupying your brain, if not a thought of 'how on earth does he plan to do that' is. Such negativity could never lead this blog to the happy pastures in which it is destined to reach. I ask that all negative thought is expelled from your mind, leaving only an empty space of naive hope and child like innocence.

Often times, we find ourselves caught up too much in what it is that is going on around us. Even I who lead a simple, perhaps hermit like life find myself worrying about the day to day trials and tribulations of it all. Sometimes it's nice to just take a few minutes away from that and listen to some music, drink some cola and write something, such as i am doing now.

I'm not sure where i am going with this blog, I truely have no clue. I guess i established that we should clear our minds! for what possible reason i am unsure and how i shall actually fulfill my promise of leaving you with happy thoughts when this blog is said and done, i do not know. Maybe i should ask that you all imagine that you read something here that is really heart warming and be done with it, such would be cheating though and would invalidate any claim of spreading joy!

We all change through our lives, on every negative can be found an equal positive. We all fail in some aspect of our lives at some point or another, the realisation of that in itself is a positive. A few years ago i was studying my A-levels, my intelligence could have dragged me through such a course blind folded. I however dropped out, ended up as a jobless bum playing computer games as if they were a job. In reading that i am sure a positive is hard to find and for a long time, perhaps there were none. What has changed in a good way is my attitude to life, it's took a while and i'm sure it could still change for the better over time but i feel like now, i have something which i didn't have then, something that had i continued without, i would have found myself crashing and burning at some point anyway. It's an actual desire to put what intelligence i do have to use. Of course, it is bad timing that such a realisation would coincide with a global economic depression and as such oppertunities are low, but perhaps the challenges that i will face over time will prove if not only to myself that who i want to be is worth the effort. If on the otherhand i decide it's too difficult or bothersome, i will know in myself that perhaps living a simple life is what i want.

We as people are all given very different qualities, it is perhaps annoying that any single quality alone will rarely get us where we want to be. I was graced with a fair intelligence but without any type of motivation behind it, i was going no where. I just hope that years of inactivity in the mental sense hasn't led to a decline in my intelligence now that i do have the motivation.

Anyway, the happy thought in all of this is, that we can be whoever we want to, it may take some time and there may be some limits but i truely believe that if you strive hard enough and work with the qualities you do have as a person, the rest will all fall into place eventually. This is the end of my happy blog! No more happy thoughts for now :)


Again, this turned into an aimless blog of no real interest or topic... i promise i'll find something interesting to blog about at some point <.<

Boring day leads me to rant on organised religion

Ever had one of those days where the idea of sleeping the whole 24 hours away seems appealing, not because of some horrible event, just simply down to boredom? Today has been like that for me.

It's been so warm today, I am bored, yet the thought of doing anything at all bores me even more. It is just one of those days where there is nothing that could possibly lift the curtain of drudgery and boredom which has befallen my simple existance. With that in mind i am uncertain of the reason to even bother blogging, as in itself it is unlikely to make any impact on my current mood or day.

It is odd, since i do have some latent desire to do something, anything, i just have no idea what that something is and everything else is boring me. This is creating a kind of restlessness that i cannot quite explain, propelling my current level of boredom ever higher. The feeling of wanting to do something but being bored by everything is quite a conflicting set of emotions that could quite easily drive one to insanity.

Before i bore anyone who may or may not be reading this blog, i should probably pick a subject of some kind of interest in which to blog about. There is only so long a blog about nothing can stay in the least bit interesting.

I'm going to pick something which i have seen mentioned a few times today, even touched upon in a discussion with my nan and that is organised religion.
So, this is going to be a somewhat long post i guess, mainly pertaining to religion and my views upon it and the reasons i feel those ways about it.

I think it would be highly ignorant or arrogant of me to state what i feel the obvious as a fact rather than a simple opinion right from the get go. That opinion is that in my mind, there simply is no God, that taken into account, i'm sure what is expected to follow is a rant about organised religion and to some extent you could be right.

One of my little brothers is a catholic, he attends a catholic school and has attended all the usual catholic 'events' a catholic boy might be expected to, Hopefully this does not include the usual catholic extra-curricular activities which from time to time grace the front pages of our newspapers. (Please read the latter as a joke...) So anyway, he attends catholic school and by all accounts believes in God and probably the catholic teachings he has so far been taught. He is a mere 8 years old and so i believe very impressionable. He is now of an adequate age that he is able to form his own opinions to some extent. He is old enough to question things he is being told and choose to believe or in some cases not to believe in them. What he has been taught in the past is of course a huge factor in what he chooses to accept today.
The point i am slowly trying to make here is that i truely believe any organisation which sets its teachings in motion from such an early age is not only reprehensible but also damaging. Whether this be an organised religion, the Nazi youth or a cult. Any organisation which not only benefits but perhaps survives on such a practice should by all means be shut down.
Do not get me wrong, i am all for freedom of religion, freedom of belief and the freedom to decide what is right or wrong, what i am completely against is the people who would decide for another what their belief is. An 8 year old child cannot make informed decisions on such complex beliefs which he can probably not comprehend past what seems a simple story in the bible with a simple moral behind it. The continued preeching to said child will leave that child with no way to doubt what he is being told, that is not belief but brainwashing. No matter how subtly it is taught, no matter how subtly it is pushed upon the child or no matter how morally sound the messages are; teaching opinion as fact is wrong.

This is perhaps my major issue with any and all major religions. Pushing a parents belief upon a child is wrong and most organised religion does this with absoloutely no sign of being ashamed. I would go as far to say that other than for the purpose of making children aware of different cultures and religions, religion has no place in any schooling system.

Many beliefs a child will consider as right are passed down by parents, teachers and those close to them, people they look upon with respect. Organised religion is by no means the only perpatrator of this but i believe it to be perhaps the most damaging.

Relgion in general i have no issue with, the teachings whilst in my opinion complete fiction, offer a good set of ground rules and morals to live ones life on. I truely believe that most of the teachings and morals behind most religions are there to improve people. I also believe they are completely out-dated, irrelevent and in some cases can be offensive.

The days where a religion is needed to tell people how they should live their lives is long past, with laws and rules set by governments across the civilised world the reason for their existance in my mind only fulfills a few purposes. To provide a reason for existance, a hope of a better place after death. The continued power over a population of people, the money and prestiege that goes with that. To wage war and spread hatred in a way which will not spark condemnation.

So many views of the major organised religions have changed over time, some very fundamental ideas have became distant from their first conception. How can a religion choose to modernise themselves without seeing that the need for change in the views it has is testement to the fact the book and teachings they preech are quite probably those written in a time where order was needed and the idea of a higher power was one that would bring that order? Thus organised religion was born.

Wow, that turned into a rant right there.

As far as i am concerned, what someone believes in, how they allow it to effect their lives is up to them. I almost wish i were able to have faith in something which seems so far fetched, it would give meaning where there is none. I just honestly believe that to not give a person the right to decide upon his own investigation what he believes in is a terrible thing.

Growing up, i of course was subjected to religion to a certain level, i never had it pushed upon me, i was never told what i was to believe in and i made my own mind up, that the idea of a supreme being creating the wolrd in less than a week was illogical. I feel for all the good that organised religion does the world, which it does in some cases, it does much more harm. So many rights issues are held back by the old fasioned views of religion and whilst in recent times their stances have changed considerably the fact that religion can have any impact on these issues is beyond ridiculous. The fact religion can preech that all men are created equal and in some cases still deny that certain groups should get equal rights based on inherent, unchangable aspects of themselves without feeling like complete hypocrits and hate spreaders is beyond me.

At the end of the day, what a child is taught at a young age can have a huge and terrible impact on how they feel about things later in their life. Allow me to give an example:

If when growing up, i were to be pushed into the catholic system and of course, began to believe in cathlocism, their teachings and ideology and truely decided i wanted to live my life as i would have believed a good person should, when i realised my sexuality i would have became very conflicted. I would have probably turned to another catholic, be it a priest or parent, who would have more likely than not only offer me the fact that homosexuality is a sin, being same sex attracted is one thing, but if i were to ever act upon that and god forbid be happy i would be commiting what could only be seen as an abobinable act of fornication and that i would most likely end up in hell. As a believer, a true believer i would be in a very conflicted state at that point, what would i do? I'd be forced to choose between a happy personal life and my religion, being taught from a young age, it is likely the religion would win through or it at least would lead me to a very fucked up state.
It was already hard enough when we consider that a man and woman being together is considered the norm. I do not expect it to be considered any other way, because that indeed is the normal practice and the one which does make most sense but to add such condemnation to it also... that would leave any child in quite the dilema.

I'm sure some catholics would act in a much better way toward this issue than the example i gave but by doing so they are interpretting the things their religion officially tells them. If they are doing that in my mind they are truely doubting the religion and its belief system. Anyone who makes an exception for any reason on any one thing their religion teaches them is wrong to do so. Simply put, if you doubt the things the religion tells you, no matter how small, you should get out and believe in what you believe in private. I'm guessing that in itself would apply to a large majority of the people within any religion. If you don't actually believe what they teach, if you don't believe everything they say, if you're willing to make exception to the way in which the religion would have you act, how can you call yourself one with that religion? Get the fuck out of the religion, stop being a hypocrit and believe what you have decided yourself, don't feel obliged to fully believe what they teach you, don't feel like you can make willy nilly exceptions to what they teach you and do the right thing.


Oh dear, i ranted a lot, about things i don't care all that much about... still, as i say... religion, great for those who believe, shit for those who are forced to or do not.

Well, i certainly did not mean to rant so much, especially not so generally with no real examples or specific feelings on specific things. Still, i find that organised religion is something which angers me greatly. I find that it holds people back, it brainwashes people, it hurts people and is incredibly outdated.

If i were to believe there was a God of any description, i'll be damned if i would follow the pre-set teaching and dictations on how i should live my life from an organised religion.

At the end of the day, i'll try to live my life in a way that hurts no one else, helps others in some cases and that the people i meet in life can look upon after my death and think 'you know what, he was a fairly nice guy.'

potato salad + absinthe = puke!

Well, i just got home, it's been a great night and so i thought what better time to sit and blog about stuff than now? I'm slightly drunk, not so much so that my thinking is impared or that i'd be unable to type this blog but enough so that everything is ever so slightly blurry now. Again i left the party feeling completely sober but arrived home a little tipsy. I had drank quite a bit tonight but never really got drunk, it was just one of those nights where perhaps a slight buzz was felt throughout the majority, but nothing more no matter how much i drank. I'm not sure that this was a disappointment though, in actual fact i may well have found what i prefer, I don't like to get completely drunk, feeling that way often leads to headaches or a sore stomach and possibly from time to time a hangover and you act stupidly and make a fool of yourself something i didn't really do tonight.

I was however sick tonight, which is a bit of a disappointment... unfortunatly after eating a large portion of potato salad i decided it was time to drink a bit of absynth, it didn't mix and i didn't hold it for much longer than 30 seconds to a minute before a huge load of projectile vomit left my mouth covering kev's patio and unfortunatly for me, when i decided to clean it up just moments later his 2 watering cans were also covered. A few glasses of water and some tissues and it was mostly clean.

Anyways, aside from the puking incident it was a good night, Marc and ruth were there, my dad and Jane / Jayne / however the fuck she spells her name was also there, my dads old housemate Richard was there and Michael a friend from school also showed up, which was a suprise. Apparently Kev stops in one stop quite often and invited two of the guys over to the party, one being michael. Anyway, it was good to catch up with him, he's a good guy and we hadn't spoken for more than 5 mins here and there for quite some time, shame that he had to witness me puking all over the place, but shit happens.

Anyway, it was nice to be able to sit and have a fairly long chat with jane about a range of subjects, she's intelligent and nice, so a good conversation is fairly easy to hold with her, she is also very easy to talk to, in a general sense, you never feel like you're wasting your breath. Perhaps the most interesting point in some ways was how she seemingly knew i was gay pretty much straight off the bat and it should make you stright guys slightly ashamed... She knew because i didn't constantly stare at the tits of people i was talking to, if female. Now if someone can tell i'm gay simply because i'm not popping my eyes out when talking to a female, something is wrong, you straighties really need to sort that shit out, women notice this shit and i'm sure most of the time think 'sigh... another one staring at the redundant lumps of flesh hanging off of my body!' She wasn't talking of her own... just want to make that clear as that would be weird since she is my dads partner and a few years north of what you would expect a male of my age to be looking for, then again... i guess that doesn't really mean anything when only looking and not looking for a partner? Who knows. Also further reconfirmation that my sexuality was no issue to my father from someone other than his own mouth was good, it's nice to truely know what someone thinks of an issue and often times that is not always possible when hearing it from their own mouth, especially when you can expect that a father/son relationship depended on what he said / felt around the issue.

Still, as i say, a good night, the food was good, the music was good... when i controlled it and the booze was good. It was nice to catch up with people and hang out.

Now, this blog is going backwards chronologically... So lets move to friday night, which was of course the LPW show. Again, what can i say to begin, other than it was a lot of fun?
I think my promo went pretty well, i managed to get some heel heat and challenging a girl of about 3 - 4 years old to a match as well as calling her by the wrong name made me chuckle immensly inside my head and after the match more audibly back stage.
It was cool to work Danny fantom (now chris coruso) and think that in the future we could have some great matches in us. Backstage was fun as always and i also found entertainment in the injury of a friend (sorry grimm!)

Where as it sucks that grimm got himself concussed, it never really is clear when wrestlers are called out to the ring to help another backstage whether or not the injury is real. Faces were called for and being a heel i decided to also go. It turns out grimm was actually injured and signs seemed to point that way in the ways that the faces were handling him, however seeing as i was out there, it was a great oppertunity to play up the legitimacy not only of the injury but of my charecter also. I pointed, laughing very loudly and generally saying things like 'this is a punishment, a warning from god!' The faces looked at me in disgust and i feel that it was a suitable use of the situation.

We ended up taking grimm to A&E, he was not in a great condition. It was scary there, people were holding clothing against their mouths and noses, there was a door, where people would come from wearing masks which could remind one of the footage from Japan during the SARS outbreak. It was quite obviously to do with the swine flu pandemic and so it wasn't the most comfortable of places to sit for any period of time. Either way i don't think i have swine flu which is a good thing. Eventually grimms parents turned up, me and john bull then left in his car for home.

On the way back we hit a ridiculous amount of traffic on the M6 due to some road works. At one point i got out of the car, walked up to a cone a kicked it over, getting back in the car which at the time was quite funny. When we passed the workers fairly slowly we played HBK's theme music and 'Real American' whilst singing loudly alond out of the window, quite a few odd looks from them were to be seen.

Aaaaaaaanyway, i'm getting kind of tired which is why this is becoming a little rushed....

Now we move on to my 'job'

Well, it lasted all of 4 days, on the 4th day i was told i needed to make a sale or i was done. Unfortunatly, it seems that telesales is just not for me, i did not make the sale. When the job constantly relies on the ability to lie, exagerate, talk over people and argue i am not so embarrassed to say that i sucked at it. When i read up on the company i worked for on blaggers.com i soon realised that it was a bit of a dodgey outfit anyway and that all of my grievances over the way they operate were well documented and often frowned heavily upon. Selling newspaper ad space, to B&B's which were often fully booked seemed futile, especially that when i got a sale, it fell through because we couldn't send them a copy of the ad we would publish... All in all, i am kind of glad i got the boot, where as i could have continued on with it i would have hated every moment.

Regarding my last blog:

Now here comes the bit where i tell you that my expectations of not plugging or recanting my previous blog were somewhat, exagerated.

I'm not going to go into any more detail on what the issues were with simmons or why i wrote the blog except to say that the issues are now (a few days later) fully resolved and that whilst the problems had became serious, they were not quite as serious as previously made out. Sometimes, the best policy for resolving an issue is making a much bigger deal of it than needed, or at least allowing for that to be done and going with the flow.

Me and simmons do have a great relationship, i love that bastard more than anything and couldn't imagine my life without him, even with him being so far away from me but as with any relationship there are times where frustration plays a bigger part than it ought to and i can say that this mostly was due to the distance and not doing anything together that we could both talk about and share things with, which has led me and him to both retry the MMORPG genre. It may sound silly, but playing games really helps in our relationship... at the end of the day, we're in a long distance relationship and it became a point where most subjects had been spoken about, most lines of conversation had been covered. We would sit and talk about how our days had been, what was going on etc and then the conversation would dwindle into small talk, we didn't do anything together or share any experiences and whilst gaming itself and talking of the game itself does not much help, it does spark conversations, it adds a layer of of conversation we havent had for a few weeks in that we're doing something together, playing with the same people and such.

Anyway, alls good with me at the moment, time to start looking for another job and continuing to make more effort with my partner.

Now it's time for bed, i'm feeling pretty tired, perhaps i will make some edits to my blog tomorrow, but for now, it's too late.

whats past is prolouge

Well, this blog here is starting without a title, I know exactly what the content of this blog is going to be, i just haven't figured out which title of the few i have in mind that i should use.

I remember my original blogs, the first couple of posts that i wrote and i remember how i deleted them not too long after. People had took interest and i had exposed myself further than i ever had before showing perhaps a side of myself that no one really knew even existed. In essence they were the ramblings of a guy whom had just found himself single after a fairly stressing and emotional break up. A whole lot of scepticism on the subject of love, whilst i believe it was fairly well written and cold as opposed to emotional I believe anyone reading it could tell that perhaps at the time, i was quite emotional.

Today is the same subject matter, hopefully less scepticle of love and certainly without the emotions i felt the last time around. It is this lack of emotion that leads me to believe that this time, the post will not be recalled because the situation will never be resolved in the way it was previously.

So again i find myself single, as i sit here typing this i have just come from an argument with the only guy i have ever loved and at this point in time, i'm not sure i could really give a shit.

That may sound cold, that may sound callous but it is absoloutely the truth. The relationship itself had not been something which provided more happiness than annoyances for a long time, infact for the most part it was a relationship of out of proportion arguments, selfishness and taking for granted. As always there is two sides to any argument and whilst i'll happily admit to some wrong doing, if you're reading this, unless you're one of a very select few you wont be hearing the other side of it. I am actually glad for that as your sanity will be spared, unfortunatly my ex-partner is not as rational as i am myself and you would likely encounter what would be a rollercoaster of emotions, spitefull insults and petty lies. I think it's a good thing he wont have much of an audience for that, as he probably only has around 10 friends on facebook anyway.

I put a lot of effort into making the relationship work, as i believe he did at most points and due to that, it is hard to really understand when it is time to let go, when enough is enough and that any hope of being together and happy in the future is so distant and unlikely a dream that it would be futile to strive toward. You don't want to decide enough is enough too early on, you may miss out on something great, yet you don't want to do it too late in the day lest you lose your mind to insanity.

I think i tried for longer than i perhaps should have done so, the arguments were becoming frequent and i a few times questioned the relationship and whether or not it was good for me. The answer was always the same in my mind 'We can make this work with effort' and i still believe to some extent that was true up until the last few weeks at which point it became impossible to fix, but when you're the only one willing to change that's bound to happen.

On reading this post, i am sure it is easy enough to assume that i do not love my ex-partner still and i had found i questioned that from time to time too. In all honesty my love for him is not the same as it once was, it has not been as strong or potent as it used to be for a short while now, but undoubtedly i still do love him but as of writing this i do not feel i am in love with him, he probably feels the same, i couldn't care enough to ask.

I honestly feel that at this point, the relationship is done, for now, for in the future and that it will never be salvaged or made up. I hope that someday myself and simmons can become friends again and who knows, after some time i could find myself feeling that a relationship with him again would be something i'd like but right now i do not feel that is on the cards. For such to happen, a very serious, long talk would need to ensue and i just do not see that happening.

This leads me onto love in general, I find that throughout my relationship my take on love has changed, it's evolved and devolved, it has shifted and shifted back. It leads me to believe that love is not one single state of mind across all people that can be identified in the same ways. Love is of different strengths, of different kinds and in general differs greatly.

Is love worth it? It's one of the first questions i find myself asking when things go wrong and it's easy enough to say no without thinking. It is, i have a lot to thank simmons for in the time we were together, he for the very most part is a great guy and i don't blame him for what has happened here, i feel we grew a part over time and neither of us stopped that from happening and now it's too late. Love hurts though and only a fool or one who had never really felt it would deny that. It's not something i wish to experience again for quite some time to come but will one day welcome it with open arms.

In all honesty i do hope that in time myself and simmons can reconcile our differences and have the talk that we need to have. I hope that on that day perhaps we will see an oppertunity to again be together, i'm not going to hold my breath for it though and i'm certainly not going to allow myself to dwell on it or feel bad over it.

Now, it's time to go listen to some more music and talk to a few people on MSN and facebook. I have work tomorrow, a job i'm really starting to hate, but don't most people also hate their jobs?

Well, if you read this, i apologise for the fact it's a little personal and probably not all that interesting a read, I just like to get things off of my chest and i find writing is a great way to do that, it helps me to stay positive :)

Ciao for now!

Wrestling, engagement party, new job!

Today has been an extremely tiring day, the past 4 days as a whole have been quite tiring, a mix of fun and fatigue in actual fact and so i'm quite enjoying being able to sit down quietly and get onto my blog, to type some random shit for all to see.

Last week on tuesday i got my first interview in quite some time, i was always fairly confident that once i got a face to face interview, getting a job is easy, explaining a long period of sitting on your ass playing world of warcraft is difficult, whilst i have things i have done, whether it be work or courses spread around that time, there has not really been a fairly long term commitment on my part in some time, except that to world of warcraft. Explaining that time away on a CV is an impossibility and thus interviews have been scarce. I believe that when i want to sell myself, i can fairly well infact and that was where my confidence stemmed from coming up to the job interview. As i suspected, the first issue which came up in the interview was my lack of actually doing anything for a while and after some questions and some explaining, i seemingly managed to give a good enough impression that the interviewer didn't seem completely scepticle of me. The interview moved on and i felt more comfortable with my chances with each passing moment. I was given a bottle of water to sell to the interviewer and she seemed pleased with my reaction to the task, stating that she 'wasnt expecting that'. I guess the fact that after a 30 second read of the bottle i chose to mention where the water is produced and the fact that this company donates to the princes trust was a different approach than she thought i would take, i'm not quite sure. Maybe it was perhaps that after stumbling on my words in the first 2 seconds of trying to sell this water that i managed to pick it up and string together sentences which not only made sense but actually seemed to sell the product well that struck her as a suprise.
Though it was perhaps when she appealed to my arrogance that i knew i had this thing won. The 'Give me 5 reasons as to why i should employ you' i feel was my real selling point. It's easy enough to become overly arrogant and a little too confident when asked to do something like this, I myself being quite arrogant realised i should avoid falling into something like that and the first thing i mentioned was in a way a negative point. 'Even though i have not worked recently, when i do work:' then i reeled off the positives, 'Work hard, there's no point in doing something with half effort, doing so is a waste of my time, your time and the customers time' and followed suit with this. By doing this I feel i managed to reanswer positively the questions she had asked me earlier on. Either way, by the time i finished, she told me that i had got the job, that whilst my work history had rang some alarm bells, she felt that i could do the job.

So a few days of nothing then passed, i enjoyed the free time i had left and generally didn't do a lot, i sat in, watched tv, played games, browsed the internet visited my nan a few times, generally relaxed, knowing that a HUGE yet welcome change to my lifestyle was incoming. I also did a little working out of my finances with this job and attempted to see how much money i could expect to save with my earning and expenditure. My general plan, without going into specific figures is to still live on as little money as possible, something i've become more than accustomed too and put all the extra pennies away in the bank, after all, i will soon need it when i move to scotland.

Now, on to the wrestling show! I receive a call from Mad Mike on thursday afternoon asking me if i was free the next day, i of course was and he asked me if i wanted to go to a wrestling show in Hull to wrestle for PWA, i was told i would wrestle Mike Romeo who Mad Mike assured was a good worker.
In actual fact, i had no idea what to expect, i've been to a lot of shows for a lot of different promotions on one offs and sometimes you get some great workers, sometimes it's guys who are fairly green, usually have good matches, but a little green. So when i arrived and get introduced to Mike Romeo i soon realise that not only does he look like a wrestler, something i can't always say about myself but he is most deffinatly not green. In all actuality he had a lot more experience than me and working with him was a pleassure. I was working face, not something i was prepared for since Mad Mike (MM from now on) had said i would be working heel. I don't usually like playing face and the crowd usually doesn't like me playing face either, Romeo had a size advantage over me and played the heel role perfectly. His offence was well paced and brutal enough that i think i got some actual sympathy at time from the crowd. His chops were great, too. I hate being chopped, it hurts and often for no reason, people often chop you, barely leave a mark or make a sound but these hurt, they made a good sound and they left fully recognisable hand imprints all over my chest and back. I had some time to do what i do best, sell! His moves were well paced, methodical and gave me plenty of time to do some proper selling, dragging myself up by his knee pads, and generally trying to get the crowd behind me. He eventually finished the match with a sweet top rope elbow drop for the win. I've a lot to learn about being a face, that being said i believe the match got over just fine and it went well.

Anyway before the show i had gone to mikes house, met his cute son foley and caught up a bit with him and ruth, after the show i spoke with ruth and tinkerbell (im still not sure what people actually call her in every day life, but thats her name so i'll use that). It was quite fun to chat with the ladies and of course aphrodite whom i had traveled to and from the show with aswell of course as mike. All in all a good night, though i was shattered by the time i got home at around 2am.... o.O

Och, where from here... hmm, interview... wrestling show... ah yes, engagement party!

Well this was a great night, it was actually a lot of fun and it was great to see marc and ruth again after recently 're-uniting' with them after a couple of years hiatus. Ruth looked great and marc looked... much more normal than previously, a fairly normal hair style, still rocking the goatee, but none the less, these two seem to be very happy together, which is of course fantastic.

My nan and grandad, were there, my dad, jane, kev and his partner whos name i unfortunatly cannot remember had arrived in the same taxi as me. Majik was also there, always great to have a quick chat with him at any oppertunity. My other cousin... Mark was also there, with his wife and 2 kids as well as marks father(s) :P

Here are a few pictures:

Mark and ruth, the happy couple!


Jane looking very... bizzare in this one


Kev being just as bizzare


My dad and Jane... i'm starting to think jane was not all that photogenic this night whilst photoed unsuspectingly, but i guess i wasn't either as you'll soon see.



Perhaps the most bizzare picture possible, My grandad has this photo took i believe and in the picture we half Marc, my mums ex husband (my dad :p in the middle) and my aunties 2 ex husbands (marcs)


The only picture i got snapped in seemingly!

There are more, but you guys get the point, to get everyone in, i'd have to add like 5 more pictures :p

It was a great night, a lot of fun and i wish marc and ruth the best. Harmony was of course still refering to me as 'chris stone' all night, never just chris. Connor is a great kid too. The food was great, the music was not so much, but it was general party music i guess and the younger kids loved it. I wasn't drunk when i left the party, by the time i got home i was however, downing a double vodka and coke and a pint just as you leave is a bit silly :)

Sunday, not a lot happened, Went to my nans for a sunday roast which she had cooked for me, my dad, jane and of course herself, it was really nice food and just nice in that it was nice to have dinner with them like that.

So, that night i wanted to get to bed early but it proved impossible, i ended up sleeping around 3-4am in the morning, so only that many hours sleep before i had to wake up at 7am to get ready for my first day at work.

What can i say about work? The people seem nice enough, i think with a little practice i can be good at the job and whilst slightly boring at times and frustrating at others, it wasn't a horrible day. I can certainly continue with this job for some time to come, getting into the proper sleeping habbits may prove tough, but once i get that sorted i feel all should be well.

All in all everything is looking up at the moment, i'm getting out more, whether it is just around with my parents, attending parties and such or wrestling, i've got myself a job and so soon money shouldn't be an issue with my low cost lifestyle.

I'm honestly looking forward to what the next couple of months brings, both in terms of whilst i'm still in england and of course when i move to scotland.

This was a long winded blog, which i hope you will forgive me for, i certainly did not mean to write it quite so long. I'm not sure when i will next write, perhaps after the week is done, perhaps after what is going to be a fairly killer party on saturday, and the lpw show on friday who knows? Until then, ciao!

I almost forgot to put a title on this!

So, i'm blogging now not for the reason that i actually have something to say or anything of interest to blog about but because i'm bored and just want to blog, regardless of the subject.

I've had a headache threatening to start for the past 2 or 3 days, a slight buzzing pain in my head that sometimes dissipates and fades away and sometimes grows slightly more painfull. Infact, i am only still awake because i earlier took a 2 hour nap to rid myself of it when it seemed like it was going to progress into a full on headache and now it's doing that again... Problem is having already slept, sleeping again is unlikely for the next couple of hours. Curse the lack of pain killers here... I hope it doesn't worsen until at least the morning so i can go get some, until that time i am completely vunerable to it.

So, i'm sat here, looking around facebook as usual, doing a few rounds on some websites i sometimes frequent and there really is not all that much going down on any of them... to put it shortly i'm bored out of my mind. Simmons went to bed an hour or two ago so i don't even have him to talk to, which further leads me to miss him more now than i did earlier. You know, anybody who goes looking for a long distance relationship and doesn't just find themself accidently in that situation is a moron and needs to do some serious thinking. I wouldn't trade it off for anything now, that being said if we were closer, this would be a hell of a lot easier on the both of us.

So today has on a whole been fairly mundane, I only really left my place to goto the shop and other than that i have been doing a whole lot of nothing with a side portion of watching through the start of NCIS season 1. I've seen some good reviews for NCIS and have been pointed to it a few times, in all reality it's fairly good, it doesn't grab you quite as quickly as other shows such as 24, Dexter or Burn Notice and perhaps in my opinion isn't quite as good the CSI series, my favourite of which is probably miami, heratio is a fantastic charecter, i love the cheesey head tilted glares he gives. Either way i think i'm going to continue watching this series as i am enjoying it.

Which reminds me, last night for the first time i watched the film 'Schindlers List', i've always had a bit of an interest in the happenings of the holocaust and Nazi germany but somehow never actually watched this before. I thought the film was great, it was obviously really well shot and thought out, the reality of it was eye opening and i really found myself feeling apalled at the realisation of 'you know what, this shit actually happened'. I've read stuff about the holocaust, horrible accounts of brutality and genocide but still, watching what looks to be a fairly accurate account of what happened really brings it home.

Through all of my jokes, some of which are very offensive if taken seriously, i find that i personally abhore any and all acts which hurt another person who can be considered innocent. Discrimination based on such ridiculous things as religion, sexuality, nationality, whether someone likes to eat pineapples or whatever else is a huge part of what is wrong with society and an issue that i feel will never truely be gone.
That being said, i feel these issues are much less prevalent than in the past, which of course is a great step. My personal recent experiences have been that the unaccepting, judging and ignorant people are by a long way a minority, often very unintelligent and almost unable to string together a sentence with a keyboard. Perhaps with these people, it is not their fault that they believe as they do but a lack of proper education in their cases or a lifestyle which is a little under what a person would desire to live. Perhaps stupidity breeds ignorance . I need to be carefull to not stereotype people with low intelligence as ignorant here, that would kill everything i have said.

In my personal experience i was not only suprised but a little shocked at the lack of negativity i was met with. I guess when you surround yourself with those who seem to be decent people with usually a good level of intelligence it shouldn't be such a shock.

Wow, that was perhaps a little deeper than i had intended to go, see this is what happens when you begin blogging with no actual aim, it goes off on a rant.

So anyway, i'm a little hungry... well i'm not, but i want to eat, i also need to pee since this bottle of Vimto has during this typing been half drank. My headache is also slowly getting worse.. perhaps not the best idea to sit here typing and rereading my blog through whilst i had one coming on... Oh well.

Either way this rambling post is done, perhaps i will make some edits tomorrow to not seem silly by anything i've said :)

A fun week!

Well this week has been a lot of fun, the re-opening of TXW and a lot of time spent with my family and simmons.

I'm going to try and make this blog flow seemlessly between the range of subjects that i'd like to cover, which isn't always so easy since mostly my thoughts are completely without structure and come out incoherently more often than not.

I thought this week would perhaps be a little awkward, after all it's not been too long since i first allowed my family the knowledge that i would never be bringing home a girl friend and infact am quite obviously an aids riddled faggot. As it goes the discussion about it happened with my nan just the day before simmons was scheduled to be here. I was acusstomed to meeting simmons on his home turf which was still miles away from his family due to living in dundee for uni, away from his family home. Him coming to see me, here obviously presented the problem that i live in the same town as my family and a meeting was somewhat inevitable. Regardless of how well my family took it in theory, surely it had to be different in practise? Thankfully for myself and to a greater extent simmons, it wasn't. He first met my nan who by all accounts is probably one of the most friendly people you could meet, they seemed to get a long just swell, perhaps too well... a photo of me as a child should never have been shown... but it was... ah well i think i was cute enough as a baby to not really have to be too embarrassed but still. My dad was fine around simmons also, i always envisioned that my dad would be the awkward one, i've no real reason to think that, but if anyone was going to be awkward around me and simmons i thought it would be him. In actuality it couldn't have gone better on the family side of things and it leaves a slightly bitter taste that i hadn't told them sooner, the only one who ever seemed to have a real problem with this.. was me, talk about making your life more difficult than it needs to be.

We actually spent a lot of time around my family, had dinner at my dads, went for a BBQ at my dads partners hou... boat :) I guess i should explain that a little, she lives on a boat in some private docking place on the canal, it's actually really nice and slightly hard to explain, lets just say it's really nice there... i mean where else could you have swans nesting in your backyard?

It was actually really cool to have Simmons come and meet people down here, see where i live and see me as i am at home before i move up to stay with him in scotland at the end of summer. Not only that but to take him to what can easily be considered one of the best wrestling shows in the country to see me wrestle was a plus. He's never seen me wrestle live, only on youtube so it was cool to go out there and wrestle in front of him especially when you throw in my dad, his partner, her daughter and her boyfriend and my nan (who i'm sure the smarks will agree was a great addidtion to the show).

Hmm, i think the seemless transition is working!

The show was great, as i say having those close to me in the crowd as well as the usual triple x crowd (which seems to have grown!) was a great plus. I always give 100% into my matches but having people i want to 'show off' to there aswell i feel like there's a need for an extra 20% effort.
The match i had with Andy shoes and Rhyme i feel went really well, it's not very often you have a triple threat match that you feel went well, infact i can't really think of another off of the top of my head which sticks out as something i'd put into the catagory of 'not only fun to do, but also came across well with the crowd' which this one certainly did. I think even simmons enjoyed it, which is somewhat of an accomplishment in itself, since out of the interests we do share, wrestling is not one. I'm just waiting for the dvd to come out of course to check out my own match but to watch what seemed like a fantastic show overall.

Now, with a lack of seemless transition i'm going to say that the movie 'drag me to hell' was nothing if not a disappointment. The basis for it was somewhat interesting i just think there are things which could have been done better, after the reviews it had been given i was expecting more.

Y'know, this blogging stuff is actually quite fun, i mean right now it's keeping my mind (kinda) off of the fact simmons is still on a train heading home when in my mind, he should be here with me. It also allows me to just reflect on all the things that have been going down and if nothing else allows me to read back later and remember, which is kinda cool. Also, the realisation that some people actually read these blogs i make is quite interesting to me too. A few times i've been chatting about something and someone's said 'oh i read X in your blog'. So, i hope to some at least some of this shit is at least a little interesting.

Now, i think i'm going to go to the shop before it closes for some cola, possibly some bread too! Tomorrow, i'm going to be sending out cv's to potential job positions and seemingly making a call about one which i have been pointed to (thanks ruth!)

My mood for once is as bright as the weather here, now if i can find a job, things will be complete :)

Battleforge becomes free to play!

Now, i feel completely shafted, you pay your money and buy a game, within 2 months, the game becomes free! that is really a stab in the back that EA performed to all of the paying customers, but what more can you expect from those money grabbing bastards?

Regardless of that the game itself is still fairly interesting and totally free, opening it up to many more people than previously. With the shockingly bad advertisement for this game, the game box cover which is something you'd pass by without even looking at because it's boring, it's suprising they got any players at all... but they did, simply not enough which i assume is what fueled them to make this move.

What it means though is that people who haven't bought this can really capitalise on the situation.

for info about the game in my last blog about it click here: http://srgtf.blogspot.com/2009/04/new-way-to-feed-my-geekyness.html


or to view their website: http://www.battleforge.com/portal/site/BattleForge/landingpage you can download it there.

it's certainly worth a go for anyone into RTS and the fantasy genre.

Less than a week later!

You know, it's usually a month or more between visits to see simmons, due to money and other such things. However, i'm writing this just under a week after my return from the land of the loch ness monster and already we have scheduled our next time to be together... in 2 days!

This marks the first time that Simmons will have come down to the land of teenage pregnancies and sluts to see me. It's quite exciting in that within this time he is going to meet, my nan, my dad, my dads partner and some of my friends and it will also be the first (probably of many) times he will see me wrestle live.

Anyway, i haven't provided any music yet so here goes: What i'm currently listening to.



You just can't beat a bit of Queen.

Poor simmons though, he doesn't even like wrestling that much, maybe going to a few live events will help that and triple x usually has something for everybody to enjoy. I must say however, the fact that he is likely to be meeting my dad for the first time at the show itself and just as possibly sitting with my family for the show is something i feel slightly bad for him about, but he'll be fine i'm sure. My crazy lil old nan is likely to love him so it should be alright. Can old women be fag hags!? I will have some friends in the audience, perhaps I will sit him with a group of those as opposed to my family, it may be more comfortable for him.

Either way, i'm looking forward to the show, it should be a lot of fun. The card is pretty strong as you'd expect of Triple X and it's an adult themed show as it always is, i love not having to watch what i say too much. Triple X is also a great oppertunity to catch up with guys i don't often see, due to location and it's always great to mix with those guys backstage.

Ah interesting days a coming!

Going to catch a movie at the cinema I think, Simmons is currently thinking 'drag me to hell' i guess it'll either be that or night at the museum, both look good, so perhaps both! The cinema has a KFC next to it too, so i think we'll stop in there first and fill our selves up ridiculously.

Anyway, lots of cleaning to do, want to make my flat immaculate for when he gets here.

Back from the land of kilts, bagpipes and irn bru...

First of all, i'm writing this sat in my boxers, a t-shirt and listening to Chris de Burgh - Spanish Train. So, if you want to read it the way it was wrote, i will give you all of the means necissary!
Here's an embedded youtube video of the song:

The rest is up to you!

So it was a great 10 days, full of chinese all you can eats, KFC boneless boxes, more cola and pork chops than you could possibly imagine, Other than the food i also spent time with Simmons, never a bad thing! During the time there we viewed that which is likely to be our home for a few years, a nice flat in close proximity to Dundee City Centre, just far enough away that loud traffic wont be a problem. It's quite a big place, plenty of room for 2, massive bedroom and living room and it already has an internet line installed... when viewing a property which is not yet empty, i find it is imperitive you check for the little blue modem sat somewhere about the place.

May 20th also marks a full year passed since Simmons first encountered me screaming about iraqi's, headshots and a war which was only happening in 3D from the comfort of my bedroom. It's hard to really comprehend the fact that i've known him for so long, yet in a weird way it seems that i've known him much longer... I can't quite explain it. Suffice to say that it's been a fairly intense year in the terms of how much we have learnt of each other.

And the next song has come, again embedded!


The 10 days i spent in Dundee were just fantastic and i got to see a side of simmons i hadn't seen quite in it's full glory before: Completely and utterly wasted. We went out to the student Union near his place for what was only going to be a couple of drinks and a few games of pool / time crisis, it turned out to be a long night of double vodka's with either red bull or coke (Diet coke on his part... i still don't get the reason behind drinking diet fizzy drinks...) Jager bombs, Becks, some cola and whiskey pitcher and several other drinks.
It became apparent at some point, that perhaps simmons had drank one too many and he asked me to go and get him some water, which i did, up at the bar which was fairly crowded i glanced back every few mins to make sure he was ok, a while after standing at the bar, i get a call from him, somehow he had managed to slip past and randomly headed outside, down a road and sat on a little wall where he was telling me to get him... anyway back to the flat and let's say simmons wasn't at his most charming... Although watching him clean up the mess he had made just a few hours later was satisfying.

and the kebab i ordered that night once he had fell asleep was fantastic, if anyone is in the Dundee area in the future, i very much suggest Istanbulli if you're in need of kebab, or 2 huge burgers, salad and shit loads of kebab meat in a bun... it's open until like 3AM each night and if you manage to relay what you want to them on the phone who can barely speak english, chances are, you're not too pissed to hold the food down once it arrives, a nice fail safe system they have implemented!

On to the next song! I'm going to assume you have not yet finished with the last 2 and wont link it, i'm likely to save myself a lot of embarrassement in not doing so...

So anyway, back to England it is... The flight was good, some really nice views, i don't think i'll ever fully get over the beauty of looking out of a plane window and this was just over Scotland and England, i can only imagine some of the sights in other parts of the world. I was greeted once i got off the following train ride, with what i can only describe as a somewhat pungent stench of stale piss at Coventry train station.. fantastic...

Next song!



Anyway, i still really wish i was still in scotland, although the prospect of moving there is getting closer and closer, which is a little scary, but exciting at the same time. LPW show tomorrow, and after a nice relaxing 10 days, i'm looking forward to letting out some aggression and shouting some obsceneties at the 'crowd' inverted comma's for obvious reasons there.

For now? I'm not sure, perhaps i will go take the washing out of the machine, talk to some people on MSN and eventually retire to my bed... that's going to feel odd...

Tedious Tuesday

Ah, so the theme of me rambling about a boring week with little to do continues. Yesterday I ended up doing nothing, the shopping still is not done. Shortly after the last blog post i remembered it was a bank holiday, meaning some of the shops i would go into would be closed, so i put it off until today.
In all fairness i could have still gotten practically everything i wanted yesterday just from tesco's alone i was probably pushing it back since it's not at it's warmest outside. Regardless, today it will be done, there is only so long one can go on eating the most plain of foods to put off going to the shops and that time has creeped up on me.

So, i awoke at around 4:30 am today, which is an hour later than yesterday, so i'm slowly getting toward a more normal sleeping pattern, hopefully i can push that forward by 2 hours today and wake up at 6:30 tomorrow. I have already watched the latest episode of 24, which for the most part wasn't all that exciting, i feel like i'm just waiting for the showdown between jack and tony which is almost certain to happen and then of course a cure for jack to be found... CSI miami is still downloading at a very slow 30kb/s but with only 700 seeds and over 6,000 leechers i guess that's fairly fast, it should be done by the time i get home from shopping. I guess later i can continue catching up on Bleach too and perhaps fill my day on facebook...

Yes, this week is going to be boring and i have no real intention to make it any more fun, I should probably start preparing to pack some things for monday at some point, but knowing me i'll leave it till the night before and end up taking still slightly damp clothing and have to wash it again when i'm up there... but i'm aiming for that not to happen this time :)

Going to pick up a new shirt today perhaps, my last one has been dyed to have a slight blue colour, this is because i'm lazy when it comes to seperating my whites, saying that i don't have many primarily white clothes and so it makes no sense to do so. The shirt is for my wrestling gimmick, the idea is to come out dressed in suit and a dog collar, clutching onto some kind of large bible, going for the 'new age' religious look. I should probably look through a few websites for common pieces of scripture which can be warped to meaning vile things aswell to quote in any promo's i might have in the future. Perhaps i will also download a series of tv which i haven't yet watched. I never really gave Lost a proper looking at, i think i watched the pilot episode and nothing more, i should probably give that a real go, since people seem to like it, although watching a tv show about some people stranded on an island doesn't seem like the most entertaining way to spend an afternoon or evening, but i could well be wrong.

For now, i'm going to go and get ready to go out shopping, perhaps do a little cleaning in the hell hole i call my home.